Trendy Shmendy

So here's the thing about me: I'm easily influenced. I am. It's not one of my best traits but there you have it. A not-so-secret about me is that I am not all that trendy. Yesterday I watched about one and half minutes of that show What Not to Wear on TLC (I love that show), but the advice-giving girl was telling the girl who needs advice that she's over thirty now and all clothes from high school must be thrown away. First of all, if I have something that still fits from high school, I think I should get to wear it just out of pure joy. I started trying to think about whether I have any clothes from high school. I actually just recently cleaned out my closet and filled a huge bag with clothes to donate to charity. I'm thinking maybe some high-school/freshman-year-of-college clothes were in there. So I really think all my high school clothes have been discarded. Part of this is because most of those clothes were tragic and really needed to be discarded. But I do have at least two pairs of jeans from early on in my college years that can never be thrown away. My bff from high school (who is still my bff and actually started being my bff during elementary school)--she and I used to go jean shopping together. (We were twinkies when we were little and liked to match. Stop laughing. Matching when you're small is cute!) Anyway, we'd shop together. And we found these jeans we loved--I think they were from Express. I still love them and think of them as my "old faithfuls." And the fact that I can still wear them makes me happy on not-so-happy days. So they serve several purposes and therefore need to be kept forever.

Anyway, the people on TLC are always giving women fabulous ideas on how they should be dressing. And I'm all about dressing for your age and looking as great as you can and whatnot. But everytime I watch that show (I'm usually wearing sweatshirts and jeans, btw), I decide all over again that I need to be more trendy. Then I remind myself that no one needs to look trendy when they're at home watching TV and I feel better. I can do my best to look nice when I'm out and about, but sweatshirts and jeans just have to be a big part of my wardrobe when I'm hanging out at home. I've noticed, though, that a few times when I'm dressed for work in the morning or ready to go out on a date with Jeff, Ashtyn has come up to me and said, "Mommy, you're beautiful." And when she says it, I really do feel beautiful. So while I'm perfectly happy wearing jeans and sweatshirts at home or to the store (or whenever I feel like it), I do have to say that there's something about dressing up that makes us feel good about ourselves. And when your toddler notices and thinks her mommy looks beautiful--well, that's a really good feeling and one I don't want to lose.

Is that important to you? How your children see you? It's important to me. Jeff said something about my mom the other day that stuck with me. I can't even remember what we were talking about, but somewhere in the conversation, Jeff said, "Well, your mom is one of the most capable women I've ever met." I've thought about that a lot. My mom is capable. And I love that Jeff sees that in her. When Ashtyn is older, I want her to have those kinds of thoughts about me. I want her to see her mom as capable. I want her to be proud of me. I'm always proud of her, of course. She can be dressing up a reindeer doll (like she was this morning) and I look at her and think she's adorable and smart and perfect. But I want my daughter to see me as more than just her mom. I want her to see me as a woman who is capable of accomplishing things. Because I want her to be encouraged that she can be a woman who is capable of accomplishing anything she wants to.
What do you think? What do you want your children to see when they look at you?


  1. Bran, nice post.. I always want my kids to see me as a genuine person (real, honest, sincere and authentic)... and YES that was one of the qualities of my mother that i totally admired! I hope my kids will say the same to me in 30 years.

  2. Nancy, I know your kids will say that about you because it's true! I was thinking I wish I could post the whole conversation that you and I and Mel had last night about motherhood! So great to hear all sorts of perspectives on motherhood.


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